The Local Girl and the Bike man

On my way home from the movies the other day, I flagged a bike to take me home. I called my area for him and asked him how much, he told #120 for a journey of #50 I looked at him with annoyance and asked him se fe wa mi de orun ni (are you carrying me to heaven) he laughed and said oya Aunty e lo le ma san (how much will you pay) I told him I could pay #50 he laughed and we started haggling.

While we were haggling, a guy tapped me on my shoulder and asked me if he could have a minute of my time and I replied NO, you can see I'm not in the mood but he was persistent so, I gave in. He started from Genesis and ended at Revelations and I still couldn't get his point. He told me how beautiful I looked, (which I knew was a lie as vain as it may sound, cause my make-up had already vanished) that he was a corper bla bla bla.. I jumped on the bike and home I was going.
Next thing I noticed was the corper on another bike chasing me telling my bike guy to stop I tapped the bike guy and I screamed saying in Yoruba te ba duro fun a ti eyin ni ma ti gba yin leti (if you wait for him I will slap your face from the back) and he said he wasn't going to wait.
When I got to the Junction of my house, I told my bike guy to stop because this corper was still following me. I got down and I told this corper that if he doesn't go back I will scream so loud they will burn him alive, He started '' but babe, because of you I lif my car in Cinema (in yoruba accent) I laughed so hard I was tearing up and I replied you left your CAR in the cinema to CHASE me on a BIKE how clever. I left him and climbed on the Bike. When I got to my destination the Bike man told me to give him my number and collect his so that when I had an outing

I could call him to come pick me and I gave him. Do you know how a teenager behave when she has a crush? Call your crush, cut the call, call your crush and say nothing tangible and do the same thing over and over? WELL this Bastard Bike man started calling me to "greet me" ha my days, I have suffered. One day he had the GUTS to call me and he called me by my name without putting Aunty or respect he started in Yoruba, "kehinde so wa ni le ki wa ki e abi ki wa gbe e jade ni" ( kehinde are you at home so I can come and greet you or should I come and take you out) ME!!! I died.

So he called again to ask how I was doing and I gave him a reply... Let me just say he won't be calling me NOW OR IN THE NEAREST FUTURE. OMO ALE JATI JATI.....Mtcheew